Freedom! It’s taken us almost half the year, but we’re finally free! Free from the shackles of state oppression! No, I haven’t turned into a student communist.

How does a bank work? In very simple terms, a bank collects deposits from savers, and lends the money to borrowers. It pays interest on the deposits, charges a higher rate of interest on what it lends, and keeps the difference as profit.

As markets from equities to commodities succumb to ever-wilder mood swings, many private and institutional investors are, quite sensibly, hoarding cash.

If you’re game for a laugh, I’d like you – in reading the following quotes – to imagine the words “tax-payers’ cash” wherever you see the words “government” or “central bank”.  Better still, imagine they spell out the words “your savings” instead. Here’s goes…